6:30 - I wake up, get dressed, clear inbox, work stuff ready, and lunches made
7:30 - wake up kids
7:45 - kids actually get out of bed!
7:46 - kids go the bathroom (and read a book or two, lolly-gagging)
7:55 - kids emerge from bathroom (!!!!!!!) And no, they don't have any digestive issues.
7:56-8:19 - Breakfast, maybe eating half of what I think is an appropriate amount, because they are too busy playing around. The rest gets chucked in a container to eat in their carseats en route. And yes, my van is a disaster.
8:20 - dressed/brush hair/teeth - usually I end up stepping in because we are already late
8:28 - actual departure
8:42 - arrival at school a few minutes late, running for the door where invariably somebody falls down and skins their knees.
8:45 - parent-child sharing time (while applying band-aids)
9:00 - sit down in van and smack forehead against steering wheel repeatedly.
Carmen's school is pretty strict about being ON TIME and ready for 15 minutes of parent-child sharing time upon arrival. Mon/Wed Keira stays home with our babysitter (phew!), while Tues/Thurs/Fri I have Keira with us. Those three days are like my own personal hell - trying (or more appropriately, cajoling, wheedling and pleading) to get both kids tickety-boo on time is hard enough. Then we get to school and I have to try to manage (!) Keira while giving Carmen my undivided attention (hasn't happened yet) to tackle the school task at hand. On the best day, this is reading library books together, where it's easy for Keira to take part. On the worst day, this is patiently helping and being present for phonetic reading or learning how a knight moves in chess. Don't get me wrong - I love being involved in my Carmen's schooling and I love her school. I love being at home with my kids, and having Keira-time with just the two of us. But by the time 9am rolls around most mornings, I am exhausted, stressed out and usually feeling some measure of mommy-guilt for failing one of my children in some way, shape or form. And then I start my work day.
Mornings are mine, period. There are some things that I can change, and some things I can't. I can't (nor do I want to) change my involvement in Carmen's schooling. I can't not take Keira to Carmen's class, or afford extra help on days I don't work. But I can change how the morning looks until then - and so enters the 'Morning Agenda'.
Something I have learned from being at school with Carmen, and yes, I consider myself a student too, is that as parents we need to step back and let kids take responsibility for things like getting dressed, remembering what days they need gym strip, and carrying their own bags into class. For the most part I can do this - but the MORNINGS! The dilly-dallying, the lolly-gagging... I feel like if I don't step in, we're going to be late late late. And the kids could care less - it is only me that gets stressed out. BUT. Change is in order, and my kids are totally old enough to handle it.
To say that my kids like their sleep is an understatement. Even though they are asleep by 8pm, they are rarely awake on their own 12hrs later and I have to wake them up for school every morning. I can't even imagine how hard it will be when they are teens!!
This morning I decided to get them up 15 mins early (7:15) and tell them my new plan. They had to go and give a 'check mark' beside the 'Wake Up' task. My oldest is totally into lists and check marks (just like Mommy, go figure) and so her curiosity was piqued. She hopped out of bed in under a minute. I was floored. Keira, who wants to do whatever her older sister is doing, followed right away. WIN!
I explained to them the list of tasks that needed to get checked off:
Wake Up
Go to Bathroom
Get Dressed
Eat Breakfast
Brush Teeth
Play!
They were intrigued and excited about making check marks and the possibility of playing if they finished in a reasonable amount of time. I explained to them that there was an alarm on my Timex that would go off at 8:19. I told them that this alarm was 'the boss' - no ifs, ands or buts - we'd have to clean up and leave for school.
While I don't really want to rush my kids through their morning visit to the bathroom (!), I have to say this totally worked. The kids were almost completely independent - all I did was put toothpaste on their brushes and serve breakfast. At 8:13am, the kids were happy PlayMobil'ing in their room together. And by 8:20am we were down the front steps.
We got to school ON TIME. And I was calm. And while Keira was a handful during 'Max the cat sat and sat', I actually had the energy to deal with it.
Way back here I posted about the boards that I use to keep my days in order. I found that the chore boards are completely unused and mostly just covered with random scribbles and phone numbers, so I decided a revamp was in order to show off the new 'Morning Agenda'. Keira painted pictures of dinosaurs while I painted this:
Can't wait until Carmen gets home to see it!
Now to find some pink & purple markers to hang from it to make the check marks...
